“When a resolute young fellow steps up to the great bully, the world, and takes him boldly by the beard, he is often surprised to find it comes off in his hand, and that it was only tied on to scare away the timid adventurers.”
Ralph Waldo Emerson
It's so easy to get stuck in it. To let it hold you back.
I have been there many times in my life.
The fear has, for example, held me back from:
- Trying new things. It has held me back from trying something new for lunch or a new hobby because I feared I would have a bad experience or fail. And so I stuck to my usual routine and choices.
- Asking someone out for a date. Because I didn’t want to risk being rejected or looking like a fool in eyes of other people.
- Living my life like I deep down wanted to. The fear has held me in its grip and calmly explained to me that it would be best and most comfortable for me to stay where I am and to do nothing new. And many times I have sadly believed the fear and gotten myself stuck in a place where I honestly deep down didn't want to be.
The fears we have are based in how we think about things. Destructive thought habits can create a lot of fear that is really unnecessary and damaging.
But there are also ways to handle these habits when they pop up and to – over time – replace them with healthier habits.
So today I'd like to share 6 destructive and fear-inducing thought habits and what to do instead of letting them roam free in your head.
1. You keep the fear foggy and undefined.
As long as your fear of doing something is foggy and undefined and just floating around in your head it will hold you back and often grow stronger with time.
What to do instead:
Ask yourself this question: what is the worst that could realistically happen?
And don’t just take a second or two to answer it.
Sit down with a pen and piece of paper. Take time to really think about it and to write out the realistic worst-case scenario.
- Bring a lot of clarity to what you truly fear.
- Defuse quite a bit of fuzzy fears or disaster scenarios that may have been bouncing around in your mind.
- Help you to realize that you can often bounce back pretty quickly even if the worst-case scenario somehow becomes reality.
2. You keep the fear to yourself.
When you keep the fear to yourself then in my experience it can easily take charge of your imagination and build a horrific and paralyzing nightmare in your mind.
Just being alone with the fear makes it is easy to lose touch with reality.
What to do…